I just got these questions from a friend of mine. Like most potential home school moms she had some good ones! I am so glad that she is approaching this commitment with an honest attitude, she seems to realize that it will be a trial and sacrifice, but hopefully what I can convey to her is that despite her selfish inclinations, home schooling her children would be huge blessing, not only to her, but to her children as well. Further more, the blessing extends to our community and society as a whole. But that soapbox is for another time.
Here are her questions in bold and my answers follow.
What was the deciding factor for you to home school?
Well, for our family the decision was made before we ever had kids. I learned about home schooling before I met my husband and knew that I needed to marry someone who felt the same way. When I encountered my first home schooling family they dressed funny, made their own bread and yogurt, all the kids were kind to each other and helped each other and they were all very intelligent. A light bulb went on inside me. I knew that that was how I wanted my family to be, I knew I HAD to do that. Maybe minus the dressing funny and the bread and yogurt... however, the bread and yogurt have come with time! :0)
It was a year or two into this job that I realized what a challenge it would be for me. I barely made it out of high school! My family, prior to marriage, sure weren't nice to each other. There was never a self- disciplined moment in my existence! Eeek. It was all catching up to me. Believe me, there were a few good solid months where I doubted EVERYTHING about the whole thing.
How confident were you on the thought of teaching different subjects? (Example: English, grammar, punctuation, spelling, etc.?)
I wasn't at all. I was horrified to teach math, which ironically has become my favorite subject to teach! I had consulted with several math teachers and home school parents who were doing a bang up job, they all recommended Saxon math to me. Wow. I was so afraid to try it. So glad I did though. It gave me confidence knowing that I had people to turn to for help if I began to sink. I never needed them. The books script out what to say, which I thought I would hate, but I realized what a boost it was for novice like me, and now I whiz through the teaching because we already know what to do. They do, I do, and it makes my kids feel confident too because they know what to expect.
It hasn't been like that for every subject. We are several years in and I just found a good English/Grammar/Punctuation curriculum that I like and that gives me that confidence boost that helps me feel like I can teach it. Yes. I am a bit dependent on some curriculums. On the other hand I have learned and gained the confidence to improvise when I want or need to. Which is empowering for a new home school mom, you begin to realized that you are learning the ropes. Then you relax a little.
What age did you start a curriculum?
I started with very little and only to help me teach reading. We did some crafty stuff from some books since I am not an artsy or crafty mom. Those things annoy me and give me the heeby-geebys. Glue and cotton balls are my nightmare! Some moms do awesome without curriculum. Some don't. Some need it all laid out, some don't. Some people find the curriculum that their children need to feel successful, however, I totally don't, and this will sound selfish, but I use what will help me, because I feel that teaching is about the teacher! You have to be able to teach them. If you hate it they will hate it! Period. If you think it is hard, so will they. When I have my best tools I am excited and prepared to do this thing which in turn makes them excited and happy to do it too. Even if it is math. Even if it is simply eating broccoli. Your attitude affects them.
How are you and your children taking to the home schooling? (Do you feel confident, second guess yourself?)
No, I don't always feel confident. Sometimes I panic. Sometimes I feel content and solid. I am a wave tossed! However, in one of my dark times, I threatened to send them to school, and they panicked! They cried. I said, "that was a dumb idea, never mind". But again, in a dark and discouraging moment I said, "get your shoes, I am going to sign you up for school" They wailed and cried, and I realized that me saying this to them was doing them harm and not good. They were scared. They don't want to go there. I said I was sorry that I scared them, and I won't say that again. They have taken to it because they don't know anything else, but I have to say that that doesn't mean we don't have hard and bad days. They would in government school too, but being home they don't have to face the pernicious and destructive social silliness that would corrupt their little souls. Yes, they have to deal with a mom who has bad days too, and who is often inconsistent and selfish but there is no better way to teach them about God and His grace by having to live out what we believe, learn to deny ourselves and sacrifice for each other. We are forced to depend on Him! We have taken to home schooling like peas and carrots, a match made in heaven.
Do your kids ask about going to a public school or ask why they don't go?
Yes, they used to. Now they don't. We would explain to them that some kids go off to school and some kids stay home. We made sure they knew tons of other families that schooled at home so they wouldn't feel alone or strange.
I don't know if this is helpful at all. I know that as a new home school mom myself at one point I had so many questions. Getting into it and then identifying myself as one woefully unprepared I knew I had a choice. Throw in the towel and send my kids off to some other person or their peers to raise them, (because that is exactly what happens, as hard as that may be to hear for some moms) or I could pull up my boot straps and get myself together (which I wasn't sure I wanted to do at that point) and figure out exactly what those kids did need and start to apply it. It has been messy for sure. I have the love of a clueless but supportive husband (when I say clueless I mean that he doesn't have anymore answers about these things than I do) who looks at me lovingly and expects me to plug along for another day. We just keep going. We pray. We trust God for the results. He gave us these precious gifts. Do we believe that He will work in their lives through broken vessels? Absolutely!
I hope that someone somewhere has been encouraged. Amen.
